Saturday, 27 February 2010

Penis power


OK, you've probably seen this video before. No doubt it has been blogged and tweeted endlessly and it's more than likely not for real, but I'm shoving it in here anyway. I can't find anything to say for the time being, so it'll keep the blog ticking over, if nothing else. It's certainly the first and more than likely the last football video you will see on lathophobic aphasia.

I take no interest in sport and can't tell lacrosse from ping-pong. I wish I knew, or could even appreciate, what it is that makes so many men loyal to a team and how they can be moved to tears of joy or misery when it wins or loses. There's only one sporting event I might devote five or ten minutes to in the absence of anything better to watch. What's it called... not the high-jump... you know the one where magnificently proportioned boys in frontally well-filled speedos dive off a high board? That one. For me, it's more studying anatomy than watching sport. I couldn't care less who wins.

So, to the video. Artemis from Athens e-mailed it to me this morning. In a match between French teams AS Groville and FC Mufflins - both made-up names - a player begins to lose his shorts, and thereby displays a very nice bum, one that to the touch would be like india rubber under silk. He then appears to pull off the ultimate in macho feats by scoring a goal with his cock, un but avec la bite, though we must be sceptical here, as that would surely have been debilitatingly painful. Whether or not he actually scores it with his tackle, the goal is allowed, and this gives rise to what for me is the best part of the video, a protest where the umm, members of the opposing team drop their shorts and wave their tools at the ref. Imagine that over here. This wonderfully gallic, phallic form of protest would have British MPs calling for disciplinary action and sending players on courses in Appropriate Behaviour Awareness and bleating that these-young-men-should-be-more-responsible-in-their-position-as-role-models-for-boys, yada yada yada. Bah, c'est des conneries, tout ça! If defiant dick-waving were a regular feature of football matches, I'd start watching and would finally have some criteria for choosing a team to support. I suppose they'd have to change the name of the sport - shaftball, or something. Any suggestions?

9 comments:

Deiniol said...

Putain, c'est rigolo ça, quoi! I am definitely going to be forwarding this to a couple of tutors at university...

vilges suola said...

S'a larf, innit? Nice butts too.

Nik_TheGreek said...

A newly found interest in sports, then?

vilges suola said...

No, just a life-long interest in cock.

Bangkok.Ian said...

The sport would have to be called 'Cocker'.

vilges suola said...

:)

Argentum Vulgaris said...

What a mixture, new rule for football, stump before the legs...

AV

vilges suola said...

Such a goal is henceforth to be known as a 'todger'or 'a quick glans'.

Gauss Jordan said...

Oh wow. Hah. If this happened in the US, we'd have a national heart attack over it.

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