Sunday, 20 December 2009

A Cautionary Tale...

...from the Daily Mail


Gareth Thomas is a ‘sporting legend’ who shocked the world rigid the other day. The Mail Online has the headline:
British Lions rugby legend Gareth Thomas: 'It's ended my marriage and nearly driven me to suicide. Now it's time to tell the world the truth - I'm gay.
Broken marriage, thoughts of ending it all, the truth out at last: FeMail is getting into some of its favourite stuff here, so get yourselves sat comfy and reach for the Kleenex. By all means feel compassion for Thomas - while not necessarily condoning his actions, of course – for Gareth and pretty wife Gemma have been on an emotional rollercoaster, a soul-searching ride to hell and back. It’s also a timely wake up call to us all, a warning of what widespread homosexualism could do to our society, one which we ignore at our peril.

If, like me, you had never heard of Gareth Thomas, here is the Mail’s introduction: ‘With 100 caps to his name - more than any other player in Welsh history - he has one of the fiercest reputations on the field, and a row of missing front teeth to prove it. At 6ft 3in and 16st of pure muscle, his masculinity has always been an absolute given.’ But how are the mighty fallen, because ‘it was all a pretence, a fragile artifice - and one which came crashing down around his ears on November 4, 2006, following a Wales game in Cardiff.’

What happened??? Did Gareth admit that he wasn’t six foot three after all? No. He was forced to acknowledge that he really liked men, to reveal that long-hidden gay secret from deep inside that had been a tight, ticking knot of a time-bomb threatening to seep out of his innermost stomach and destroy him for living a tissue of lies. 'It felt as if I had a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other.’ When matters all came rushing finally to an ultimate head, his devastated wife crumbled, and they both split up and fell apart. All this, after their fairy tale wedding in the pretty village of St Brides Major, and the heartbreak of several miscarriages. After twenty years of standing on cliff edges, dipping a toe into the water and wondering whether or not to jump off, Gareth has now taken the plunge and come out as a pouf. 'I've been through all sorts of emotions with this, tears, anger and absolute despair,' he says. He is still ‘consumed with guilt,’ whilst nonetheless happy to be ‘single and free to date whomever he pleases without fear of being 'outed'. He says he feels like a teenager again, re-living his youth, discovering who he really is.’

Heed then the Mail’s cautionary tale of Gareth Thomas, a man given to unnatural desires, one who took the momentous decision to indulge them.  He at least is happy now, having reverted to being a teenager again. Don't they always say homosexuality is caused by arrested development? Think of his wife, of the family that might have been, and ponder, deep in your heart, the wisdom of his choice. If only he had been straight, and left his wife for another woman like a normal bloke.

*****

I always thought my masculinity was an absolute given too. I’m not six foot three or sixteen stone of muscle, but I have XY chromosomes, a dick, balls and a hairy chest, and was under the impression that I met all the requirements. I was born with them (apart from the hairy chest) and the fact that sexually I only like men seemed to me irrelevant to my masculinity. So I too have been living a lie!

For the Daily Mail readers' info, I have had it off with three prop forwards, and am able to confirm that gay rugby players are not especially rare. Most rugby players are comfortable enough in their maleness not to give a monkey's in any case. See this NSFW link if you don't believe me, and if you don't mind a bit of cock. Good luck to Gareth Thomas, and fuck the Daily Mail.

6 comments:

Bo said...

Yes, fuck them, the vicious, spiteful little bastards. Just for once, why couldn't all our home-grown jihadis and muhajedin do something useful and do a Mumbai-style thing in the Daily Mail offices? I wouldn't want them *all* killed, just some, pour encourager les autres.

vilges suola said...

Eliminating that Jan Moir woman would be enough, I think.

Nik_TheGreek said...

My sentiments exactly: Why, oh why were you reading the Daily Mail?

Congratulations on Gareth Thomas, there aren't many out gay rugby players out there...

vilges suola said...

I followed a link from another blog. The Mail is always good for inspiring a parody or a bit of vitriol.

Doomed But Cheerful! said...

Having moved as far from UK as one can, without starting to come back, I am SO pleased to report that the Daily Mail is not available within 100s of km from my house.

Such a noxious, poisonous rag. Meanwhile, this guy has a bit of a journey to travel - I wish him luck.

And for you - Happy Christmas!

G =]

vilges suola said...

Thanks, and you! Do you have anything similar to the Mail, though, or is it just a British phenomenon?

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