Sunday, 15 February 2009

He that Sitteth in the Heavens Shall Laugh



It's important to raise your kids for The Lord


I have never been to Basingstoke, nor now shall I, for that Christ-rejecting, Satan-worshipping town is accursed of Almighty God and its inhabitants lost to shame. Yes, God hates Basingstoke, and I’ll tell you why. Those evil, fornicating, faeces-eating fag-enabling bastards of Basingstoke, those nekkid merchants of anal copulating, have taken time out from bestiality, adultery and urinating on bibles to schedule a performance of The Laramie Project at the Central Studio at Queen Mary’s College, and the Suffering Saints of Westboro Baptist Church are coming from Kansas on the 20th of February to picket the theatre in Religious Protest, NOT at the sphincter-winking awfulness of Brits doing American accents, no, but at the vile impudence of a show that presents the filthy face of fag evil, suggesting that Matthew Shepard might not have deserved to be beaten up and left in a frozen field to die, just because he was a vile, feces-loving, semen-drinking faggot who went trolling for strange flesh in a sodomites’ bar one evening. So listen up, you limey faggot-loving fornicators! Hear ye the words of Shirley Phelps-Roper, and tremble – NOT THAT YOU WILL, oh, no, because the Lord God Almighty has already hardened your evil, faggot-kissing hearts!

‘We will picket them, [actually, they won't]and see if they actually believe those lies they tell about how tolerant and accepting Brits are. RIIIIGHT! Just because you rage against God and make laws that say you cannot use "hate speech" (a/k/a - you may not speak of the Bible standards) in the UK does NOT mean you will not get the message that God Almighty intends for you to get. God Hates England; Your Queen Is A Whore; You Hate God; God Hates You; You're Going to Hell; Matt Is In Hell; Hell Is Real Ask Matt; God Hates Fags (Buggers); Obey God, etc. Some of the best Bible preaching in the history of the world came out of that dark dismal land, but now it is full of all abominations! God will shortly destroy the UK and the world, but not until they have gotten the plain, clear message so that they will be WITHOUT EXCUSE!’


That’s telling you!

Anyway, since we are all off to Hell in a hand basket, let’s at least have a giggle on the way at Pastor Fred Phelps his sermons, from which the choicest pearls are strung together below. Ol' Fred is a festering, roiling, slurping mess of sexual repression and self-hatred, disgorging embossèd sores and headed evils into the general world. Sodomite semen, sodomite faeces, sodomite rectal blood, presidents masturbating horses...dear, dear... then he calls us perverts: 'tasty, that fag sex, oh, so good!'. It was George W. Bush who masturbated horses, by the way. Bet you didn't know that! he's gone, of course, but don't relax yet, as things are much worse now. Y'all're gonna wish you still had a president who just innocently pumped equine peter, 'cuz the time has been at hand for 2000 years and WBC now reveals that Obama is the Antichrist, come at last!

Go here for a curious tale of friendship between Shirley Phelps-Roper and a drag queen.

12 comments:

Mariana said...

So, anyone who doesn't die a peaceful death in his sleep is a fag and/or fag lover? A truly insane man. Guys like this are no threat to rational thinking, because even believers turn their backs on them.

Vilges Suola said...

The WBC crew do the cause of gay rights no end of good with their ugly picketing and their virulent website. Who'd want to be anything like them?

Anonymous said...

I guess you won't be coming to the UK after all.... this must be divine intervention....

MSG

Vilges Suola said...

Am in the UK already!

Anonymous said...

i dont think they meant you personally. I think they meant in general.

Vilges Suola said...

You mean the bit about 'filth'? I think in the link they provide to this blog the 'filth' in question is its gay content.

Anonymous said...

this is a bunch of major BS, this is wrong, it's sick and completely twisted. you know why? cause I am gay and i know in my heart that god loves me, all you sick ppl who believe that the WBC is right in doing this will all burn in hell.

Vilges Suola said...

Yes, I agree. Did you miss the sarcasm?

Anonymous said...

Vilges, I think Anonymous was referring to the home office blocking the Phelps' visit to England and not a personal attack against you. Or were you being sarcastic again?

Vilges Suola said...

I'm not sure which anonymous you are refering to here?

keith said...

Great posting, very funny. It made me remember a joke. A man says "Where are we going, and why am I in a hand-basket?"


What is a hand-basked anyway?

If you want a little nostalgia, I wrote about my trip to Athens a few years ago in my old online photo-journal: http://www.brokenwhole.com/oldjournal/journal/daily/2003/12/122103.htm

Very interesting blog - adding it to my small but growing blogroll. Keep it up!

Regards, Keith

Vilges Suola said...

Keith - no idea what a handbasket is, will have to google it. Anyway, thanks for the nice comment and very glad you like the blog! Steve

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