It's important to raise your kids for The Lord
I have never been to Basingstoke, nor now shall I, for that Christ-rejecting, Satan-worshipping town is accursed of Almighty God and its inhabitants lost to shame. Yes, God hates Basingstoke, and I’ll tell you why. Those evil, fornicating, faeces-eating fag-enabling bastards of Basingstoke, those nekkid merchants of anal copulating, have taken time out from bestiality, adultery and urinating on bibles to schedule a performance of The Laramie Project at the Central Studio at Queen Mary’s College, and the Suffering Saints of Westboro Baptist Church are coming from Kansas on the 20th of February to picket the theatre in Religious Protest, NOT at the sphincter-winking awfulness of Brits doing American accents, no, but at the vile impudence of a show that presents the filthy face of fag evil, suggesting that Matthew Shepard might not have deserved to be beaten up and left in a frozen field to die, just because he was a vile, feces-loving, semen-drinking faggot who went trolling for strange flesh in a sodomites’ bar one evening. So listen up, you limey faggot-loving fornicators! Hear ye the words of Shirley Phelps-Roper, and tremble – NOT THAT YOU WILL, oh, no, because the Lord God Almighty has already hardened your evil, faggot-kissing hearts!
‘We will picket them, [actually, they won't]and see if they actually believe those lies they tell about how tolerant and accepting Brits are. RIIIIGHT! Just because you rage against God and make laws that say you cannot use "hate speech" (a/k/a - you may not speak of the Bible standards) in the UK does NOT mean you will not get the message that God Almighty intends for you to get. God Hates England; Your Queen Is A Whore; You Hate God; God Hates You; You're Going to Hell; Matt Is In Hell; Hell Is Real Ask Matt; God Hates Fags (Buggers); Obey God, etc. Some of the best Bible preaching in the history of the world came out of that dark dismal land, but now it is full of all abominations! God will shortly destroy the UK and the world, but not until they have gotten the plain, clear message so that they will be WITHOUT EXCUSE!’
That’s telling you!
Anyway, since we are all off to Hell in a hand basket, let’s at least have a giggle on the way at Pastor Fred Phelps his sermons, from which the choicest pearls are strung together below. Ol' Fred is a festering, roiling, slurping mess of sexual repression and self-hatred, disgorging embossèd sores and headed evils into the general world. Sodomite semen, sodomite faeces, sodomite rectal blood, presidents masturbating horses...dear, dear... then he calls us perverts: 'tasty, that fag sex, oh, so good!'. It was George W. Bush who masturbated horses, by the way. Bet you didn't know that! he's gone, of course, but don't relax yet, as things are much worse now. Y'all're gonna wish you still had a president who just innocently pumped equine peter, 'cuz the time has been at hand for 2000 years and WBC now reveals that Obama is the Antichrist, come at last!
Go here for a curious tale of friendship between Shirley Phelps-Roper and a drag queen.